


Like Rum on a Fire

by brightlikeloulou



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Getting Together, Implied/Referenced Sex, M/M, No Gracie in this fic, Paul has an actual backstory, Paul has some issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-20
Updated: 2018-12-22
Packaged: 2019-09-23 11:16:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17079311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brightlikeloulou/pseuds/brightlikeloulou
Summary: Paul had always had a lot of walls. Paul had always had a way of hiding himself away, Jesus was his mask.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Title is a lyric from the Hozier song Cherry Wine. 
> 
> \----
> 
> First Jaaron fic :)

It was warm under the covers, almost too warm. The window to the bedroom was open, and a soft breeze fluttered inside from the dark night, but it wasn't enough.

There was a slight thump behind Paul's eyes, and he sighed as he massaged his brow. The figure beside him shifted, and he looked down at the sleeping man. Alex was on his side, the covers pulled up to his bicep, his face was pressed against the pillow and his usually neat dark brown hair was a mess.

Alex had fallen asleep quickly, Paul had had a stressful day and was a little rougher and harder than usual, and apparently, it had worn the younger nurse out a fair bit.

Deciding that he wanted to stay no longer, Paul carefully pushed the covers off his body and climbed out of bed. He didn't want to wake the younger man, he knew that he had had a long day too, that's why he had asked Paul to meet him, and simply, Paul didn't want to deal with hearing him ask him to stay.

He retrieved his clothes from where they were scattered around Alex's bedroom and pulled them on quietly before he made his way to the door. He sighed heavily as he pushed the heavy wooden door closed behind him. He was about to make his way down the hall and out of Barrington House when he noticed the figure sat on the stairs a few meters in front of him.

Aaron looked at him, an expression on his face that Paul could not read.

"Hey," Paul said as he walked towards the slightly older man.

"Hey," Aaron replied, looked up at him with a little smirk and at the door that Paul had just come out of, "You're not into the whole pillow-talk and early morning snuggles?"

Paul rolled his eyes, and huffed a quiet laugh, "No, definitely not. I stayed until he fell asleep, that's more than usual."

"How romantic,"

"I'm not romantic,"

"I can see that,"

Paul rolled his eyes again and sighed heavily as he leaned against the wall and folded his arms over his chest.

"That's Alex's room, right?" Aaron asked after a few moments, leaning back against the stairs.

"Yeah," Paul answered, and wondered why Aaron was so curious.

"I thought he and Wes were together?" He asked, and stifled a yawn in his elbow afterward, Paul checked his watch and found that it was just after midnight.

"They're on and off. Whenever they're off, Alex comes to me, tries to make us on,"

"But that's not your thing?"

Paul looked over his face, found that smirk still on his lips, partially hidden beneath his beard, "Like we established earlier, I don't do the whole snuggling and pillow-talk, or really anything other than sex for that matter,"

Aaron laughed, "Man, you must have broken so many hearts in college,"

Paul laughed too, it was quiet, but no less genuine, "What are you doing out here anyway?" He asked.

"My room was too hot, it's a bit cooler out here," He answered.

Paul nodded and pushed himself off the wall, "Well, I'm going to bed, I'll see you tomorrow,"

"Goodnight, Jesus," Aaron replied quietly.

Paul exited Barrington House and began making his way to his trailer. It only took him a few moments, and he shoved the door closed behind him once he was inside. He kicked off his boots before he made his way into the bathroom. After turning the light on, he was greeted with the sight of himself in the mirror.

His hair was messy, and it wouldn't have been hard to guess what he was up to an hour or so before. He had a hickey over his collarbone that he rolled his eyes at because no matter how many times he asked Alex not to leave them, he did anyway. Paul hated how they looked, looked like he'd been marked, it was too possessive of a gesture for him to think of it as anything else.

He shoved the rest of his clothes off and placed them into his hamper, it was nearing full, and he was running out of clothes. He needed to get laundry done soon, either do it himself or ask if Tammy or Bertie would mind doing it for him.

He started to feel the sting on his back from where Alex's fingernails had left marks as he reached up to brush out his hair, another thing that made him feel like he'd been marked.

He looked at his hair in the mirror for a while, it had grown so long since the outbreak had started almost six years previous. It had been in a short style when it began, along with his beard being only stubble, but he was on the road for ten months before he came across The Hilltop, and that had given them both plenty of time to grow out. Within a week of arriving at The Hilltop, the people were calling him Jesus.

He'd used it as a mask ever since, not necessarily the hair and beard, he actually liked how he looked with those, but the whole Jesus persona. Hid behind it, hid himself. It became routine after a while, not having people close to him, just going day by day to keep those around him alive but not really caring much about himself.

Things had changed when the Alexandrians came along four years ago though, Paul gradually let his walls down for the grieving but incredibly strong widow that he saw himself in. She became his best friend and the first person he had gotten close to after the outbreak. He let her see some of what was behind his walls, but not too much.

Paul quickly brushed his teeth and put his hair up before he returned to the main part of his trailer. He pulled on some boxers so he wouldn't be completely naked if someone burst inside, and removed all of the covers off his bed except for the sheets before he laid down.

He got comfortable on his back, with his legs stretched out before he closed his eyes. It took him a while, but he eventually drifted off to sleep.

 

* * *

 

The next day, the heat hadn't given up at all. It was humid and sticky and by ten am, Paul could already feel sweat sticking his shirt to his back.

He was in the shade at least, and that was something.

The stables were probably his favorite place inside the walls of The Hilltop, which wasn't really saying a lot as the only places inside the walls he did like other than the stables were his trailer and the balconies and roof of Barrington House.

He had his horse, Archie, tied to one of the small grazing paddock's fences and was grooming his black coat. He had rolled in his stall during the night and had gotten himself covered in dirt, and grossly, some of his own shit. Paul had had Archie for about a year now, he'd been riding ever since after the war when The Kingdom had given them horses, but he shared one of the horses with many other residents. Archie, Paul had found out in the woods one day, underweight and with a bad cut on his leg.

The horse was weary of him and everyone else at first, but soon warmed right up and formed a bond with Paul as he nursed him back to health. Everyone sort of just decided that Archie was Paul's and Paul's only, and Paul had never once complained about it.

Paul was working on getting the knots out of the gelding's tail while he happily chewed on the wooden post when he heard somebody and a horse approaching him. He looked over his shoulder and found Aaron walking towards him, the paint horse that he often rode obediently following on her lead beside him.

"Morning," Aaron greeted him as he tethered Bubbles (one of the children had named her) to the fence beside Archie.

"Morning," Paul replied.

"You know, I was really hoping it was going to be a bit cooler today," Aaron said as he began searching through the grooming kit that was sat on the ground.

Paul hummed, "Won't be much longer, colder months aren't far off. Only a few weeks until the start of Autumn,"

"A few weeks too long," Aaron grunted.

Paul huffed a laugh, "You really do not like the heat, do you?"

"Who does?" Aaron snapped back playfully, "Me and Eric lived in Michigan for six years before the outbreak, I guess I just got used to not being in such hot temperatures," He said as he began brushing Bubbles.

There wasn't any sadness in the man's voice Paul noticed, for years, Aaron had always sounded upset and depressed whenever he talked about his former partner, but in the past year or so, he had mostly overcome his grief and sounded fond and happy whenever he talked about Eric, not that he did it often though.

"Guess I'm the opposite then," Paul said, finally getting out the last of the large knot that Archie had worked his tail into.

Aaron was quiet for a moment, "Where did you grow up?" He asked, and Paul wondered if he knew how obvious it was that he asked the question carefully.

"LA," Paul replied, tossing the comb back into the kit.

"Huh," Aaron replied, "I've been there a few times, fun place,"

Paul huffed at that, "Depends where you are," He said vaguely, shoving memories to the back of his mind as he untied Archie from the post and lead him into the grazing paddock, "I need to go and see Maggie," He said as a goodbye before walking away from the fence and towards Barrington House.

 

* * *

 

Maggie was sitting on the floor and playing with Hershel when Paul walked into the office.

They both looked over at him and smiled when they heard him enter, "Hi, Uncle Jeejee," Hershel greeted him happily, enthusiastically waving his arms in a wave.

Paul couldn't help how his lips perked up at the name. Back when Hershel was learning to talk, instead of going to the effort to say Uncle Jesus, he decided that Uncle Jeejee was just fine. And now, two years later, he still called him by it.

Paul sat down on the chair closest to them and reached out to ruffle the boy's hair, which made him giggle, "Hey, sweetheart," He greeted him, and then turned his attention to Maggie, who was watching them fondly.

"What can I help you with?" She asked, tucking some hair behind her ears and resting her weight on a hand.

"Do you have that list? What I need to look for when I go scavenging next week?" He asked her, crossing one of his legs over the other.

"Yeah, hold on," She replied and pushed herself onto her feet and walked over to her desk.

After spending a few moments rifling through papers, she returned and handed the piece of paper to him. "That's everything, there's some simple supplies and some other stuff that might be harder to find," She told him as she sat back down with Hershel who had begun doing a puzzle.

Paul did a quick scan of the list before he looked over at her, "I'll try my best," He told her.

"Are you going alone?"

"I don't know," Paul sighed, "I might ask Aaron to come with me, he's a good scavenger, and he seems to be getting sick of being behind the walls too,"

Maggie nodded in agreement, "Alright, just let me know,"

Paul nodded, "Will do," He replied as he stood up from the cushioned chair, and he ruffled Hershel's hair again as he passed him.

Paul settled down in his trailer again, he had his notes from the town he had recently scouted and cleared out of any walkers and compared them with the list that Maggie had given him, trying to get an idea of where what items might be. He worked on it for several hours, stripping his shirt off at one point due to the heat, and once he was satisfied with his progress, he packed away the mess he had made on his dining table.

He showered after that, not planning on leaving his trailer again until the morning.

As he brushed his teeth, he stared at the hickey that seemed to be bruising, even more, wishing that he could just make it disappear.

But if only things were that easy.


	2. Chapter 2

"Nice, neck,"

"What?" Paul replied, his brows furrowed as he looked over at Aaron who rode beside him.

Aaron smirked a little, "Your neck, it's got a bit of a bruise on it, Jesus," He said.

Paul quickly caught on and looked away, "Fucking Alex," He grunted and pulled up the collar of his button up to try and hide the mark somewhat, he had spent the previous night with Alex again, and it had once again left him with an unwanted hickey.

His friend laughed softly, "I'm just messing with you," He said and affectionately petted Bubbles' neck when she stumbled on a rock.

"No matter how many fucking times I tell him not to, I'm always left with at least one by the time we're done," He said offhandedly.

He could see out of the corner of his eye that Aaron was looking over at him, but Paul paid no attention to him.

"If he's doing something you don't like, after you've asked him not to, that's not okay, Jesus," Aaron said softly.

That made Paul look at him, his gaze hard and icy, "It's a fucking hickey, not a slap, Aaron," He spat.

Aaron's face seemed to harden at his words, "It doesn't matter what it is, Jesus," He said.

"I'm not having this conversation," Paul told him after being quiet for a few moments.

He tightened his grip on Archie's reigns a little and kicked the horse into a trot along the path. He heard a sigh come from behind him, and then the sound of Bubbles also moving into a trot.

They rode in silence until they reached the first trap. Paul stayed mounted while Aaron checked it, pulling the rabbit from it and placing it into the game bag that he had tied to the side of Bubbles' saddle. Once that was done, he mounted again, and the two of them continued on their way.

"I'm sorry," Aaron said after several long minutes of silence.

Paul looked over at him with creased brows and a frown, "What for?"

"For what I said before," He replied, his blue eyes boring into his own, "Trust me, I'm very much aware that you can handle herself, I just didn't like the sound of it,"

"Mine and Alex's relationship isn't really your concern," Paul said, finding himself very uncomfortable.

Aaron nodded, "I know that," He sighed, "But you know, we're friends, talking about relationships is a normal thing friends do. I didn't think to bring it up would do any harm,"

"Well, I don't exactly like sharing personal things,"

"I'm aware of that," Aaron replied, and Paul noticed the little frown on his face, "We've been friends for years, and I don't know a lot about you. Your real name is Paul Rovia, yet you hate people calling you by it, you love reading, you're incredibly smart, and you grew up in LA,"

Paul went quiet and shifted in his saddle, his stomach did a little flip at you're incredibly smart, and he wasn't quite sure what he was meant to say, so he opted for nothing.

"That's all I know about you," Aaron continued after realizing that he wasn't going to say anything more, "I'd like to know more,"

Paul once again went quiet, "I'm going scavenging next week, you're welcome to come," he said after what could have easily been several minutes.

They reached the next trap just moments later, and Paul noticed the little smile that Aaron had on his face as he dismounted to check the trap.

"Sure," The curly-headed man eventually replied, directing his smile at him as he placed another rabbit into the game bag.

Paul nodded, "Okay," He said, "You can put your new skills to the test," He added a moment later, referring to all training they had been doing together. A grin pulled on his lips as he looked over at Aaron.

Aaron laughed softly, "Sounds like a plan. Just stick close in case I fall on my ass like I managed to do yesterday,"

Paul snorted at that, the image of Aaron slipping over when Paul had dodged his kick still clear in his mind.

 

* * *

 

They arrived back at The Hilltop just as the sun began to set, and they hurried to get the horses back to the stables and groomed and fed before they lost their ability to see what they were doing.

They were heading back towards Barrington House when a little figure ran out at them from the steps and launched himself at Paul's thighs.

Paul grunted a little bit at the unexpected contact but leaned down and scooped up the little boy. Hershel giggled as Paul ruffled his hair.

"Where's your mama?" Paul asked, looking around, he caught Aaron smiling at him, and he smiled back.

Hershel wriggled a little and pointed over to the small porch swing that had been built just by Barrington House's entrance, "Over there, Uncle Jeejee,"

Paul began walking over, and he could hear Aaron following behind him. Paul smiled at Maggie as he approached her, "Hey," He said softly as he sat Hershel down on her lap, and he smiled when she immediately wrapped her arms around the little boy and kissed his head.

"How did it go?" She asked, giving them both warm but tired smiles.

"Pretty good," Aaron said and leaned back against the railing, "The traps Daryl set before he left were good, a rabbit in each one, we've sent them off to inventory,"

"Fantastic," Maggie said, "We had been running almost low on meat,"

Paul hummed and grinned when Hershel grabbed his hand and began playing with the tab on his gloves, "Aaron's agreed to come scavenging with me next week,"

"Oh, great, though you're perfectly capable, I'd much prefer that you didn't go out there by yourself," She said, and Paul rolled his eyes, and that made Maggie grin. "Anyway, I'll let Tammy know that she'll need to double the food for you that I was having her sort,"

"We'll more than likely find some out there, don't go overboard," Aaron said, and then yawned loudly into his elbow.

Paul nodded in agreement, and looked at Aaron, "It's only six, are you seriously that tired?" He teased.

Aaron sneakily gave him the finger so that Hershel wouldn't see, and Paul chuckled.

 

* * *

  

It was the middle of the night when Paul saw Aaron again, he was by the gate and on watch duty when he heard the footsteps of the man climbing the ladder to join him.

"What are you doing awake?" Paul asked as the man's head appeared, he had dark circles under his red and puffy eyes, he had been crying, Paul noticed.

Aaron sighed and settled down beside him, "I couldn't sleep," He said quietly and stretched his long legs out in front of him, "Well, I was sleeping, but then I had a dream, and well... Just didn't feel like being alone," He said it shyly, and Paul noticed he was fiddling with his fingers.

Paul watched him for several moments, trying to read the expression on his face. He reached over and petted Aaron's thigh, "You're welcome here with me," He told Aaron, and smiled gently at him.

Aaron smiled back, and Paul noticed the man's lips quiver a little, "Thank you, Jesus,"

They both looked away from each other, and out at the dark woods in front of them. The only sound was that of their own breathing and the occasional owl and cricket.

They sat there in silence for almost an hour when Paul suddenly felt Aaron's head land on his shoulder. It made Paul jump slightly, and he looked down at him. He found Aaron fast asleep and awkwardly slumped over.

Paul blinked in surprise for several long moments and swallowed thickly. He was a little uncomfortable at the contact and was tempted to wake Aaron up or move him off him, but the man's red-rimmed eyes and how he had said he couldn't sleep, overpowered it and Paul tried to make himself relax as he let Aaron use him as a pillow.

Contact like that wasn't exactly new to Paul, he and Maggie slept on one another often, and a few times he had given in to Alex and cuddled with him, but it felt different with Aaron, and he wasn't sure why. Maybe it was because he and Aaron were similar in so many ways, both seen awful things, both been through a lot, they had both lost lovers.

An image of a man with tan skin and thick black hair and neat stubble filled Paul's mind, and he immediately tried to shove him away. Maggie was the only one who knew about him, Maggie was really the only one who knew anything about him.

Paul closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

It was an hour later that Aaron woke up, he seemed to do so slowly, and then after realizing what he had done, he jumped up like he had gotten an electric shock.

He looked over at Paul with wide eyes and flickered his eyes over him. Paul quirked one of his brows.

"I'm sorry," Aaron finally managed to say, his voice was still thick with sleep, and that along with his doe-eyed look, Paul thought he was cute at that moment.

Paul shook his head, "Relax, it's fine,"

Aaron sighed loudly and rubbed his hands over his face, and then through his hair. "God, I'm exhausted," He said quietly.

"Why don't you go back to your room? Try and get some sleep?" Paul suggested, his voice soft.

"I uh," Aaron started, looked over at him for a few seconds, and then stood up, "Yeah, okay,"

"I'll see you tomorrow," Paul said as he watched the man climb down the ladder.

Aaron stopped for a second, and managed to give him a soft smile, "Yeah, see you,"

Paul watched him go, and then sighed loudly and then turned back to watching the woods for any sign of something that shouldn't be there.

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments are loved! Xxx
> 
> Tumblr - iiloulouii


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